Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Guys I'd Go Gay For

It's Man-Crush Thursday here at He Shot Cyrus. This just couldn't wait for Man-Crush Monday. Caitlin over at 1416 and Counting just created a mega-post dedicated to the men in her life. All those interested in looking at picture of attractive fellas, go check it out. But not before you leave some comments listing your most beautiful beaus.

Remember, every comment you leave makes you eligible for next month's He Shot Cyrus Top Comment Award. This month's winner, Keith from The Kinetoscope Parlor, will continue to receive publicity like this along with his JPEG trophy.

On to the Guys I'd Go Gay For list:

John Cusack - I recently figured this one out. I want to be Rob Gordon. He's owns a record store. He used to be a DJ. Making mixes for people is his greatest joy. He's dated gorgeous women. Also, he is constantly making Top 5 lists. What more could I guy want? Plus, he's hot.

I like going record shopping. I dream of being a DJ. People get mixes from me even when they don't ask for them. I'm dating a gorgeous girl right now. I make Top 5 lists all the time. Want to know my Top 5 John Cusack Performances? 1. Rob in High Fidelity 2. Lloyd Dobler in Say Anything 3. Martin Q. Blank in Grosse Point Blank 4. Gib in The Sure Thing 5. Eddie Thomas in American Sweethearts

Gael Garcia Bernal - Not only is this guy the hottest man alive, he also takes the best role choices. He's the adulterous priest in the imaginative dreamer in The Science of Sleep, and the young Che Guevara in The Motorcycle Diaries. He's the type of good looking that makes you convince yourself you'll die looking like John C. Reilly.

Sidney Poitier - An oldie but a goodie. He's hotter than Clark Gable. Hotter than Gregory Peck. Even hotter than Cary Grant. That's right, I said it! And in the heat of the night, he'll make you call him MISTER Tibbs. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Jason Bateman - John Krasinski didn't make the list because when he's not on The Office, I could go either way. I have more of a man-crush on Bateman than on his character from Arrested Development. Juno, Hancock, and Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium proved that. This man is adorable. Adorable.

Denzel Washington - This man has charisma like no other. He could talk anyone into doing anything. And I do mean anything. Now he's remaking one of my favorite 70s thrillers, The Taking of Pelham 123. This just keep getting better and better.

Taye Diggs - There hasn't been a better looking couple since Taye Diggs and Sanaa Lathan reminisced about watching Slick Rick, Doug E. Fresh, and Dana Dane in a cypher circle circa 1984. Wait, you didn't see Brown Sugar? Shame. If you love hip-hop and talking about hip-hop, you should. Back to the man of the moment, you probably know him as the announcer from Chicago. Smooth, good looking, nice smile. Not as charismatic as Denzel, but pretty close.

Jonah Hill - If you don't think this guy's sexy, I'm taking it personally. He's attractive, damn it!

There you go, the guys I'd go gay for. EVERYBODY, leave a comment with your own lists. Thanks!


Fox said...

Ah man... do they have to be alive???

Oh well... it's my gay life, I can have my gay fantasies anyway I wanna!


1. Errol Flynn
2. Jason Statham
3. Jean-Luc Godard
4. Tony Leung
5. Sean William Scott
6. Chiwetel Ejiofor
7. Paddy Considine
8. Colin Farrell
9. David Thewlis

and for # 10, I will piggy-back on El G's pick of Jonah Hill. Does that mean we are gonna be having a three-way? SCANDAL in the blogosphere!!!

elgringo said...

Chiwetel Ejiofor and Paddy Considine should have made my list. Great choices.

Good choice with Jonah Hill. Chubby, curly-haired guys with flannel shirts on top of t-shirts with comedians on them should be all the rage. We'll have our day.

Big Mike Mendez said...

Yes, yes, yes Jason Bateman, yes! But no man0crush for Clive Owen, Christian Bale or Robert Downey Jr.?

Simon Pegg?


elgringo said...

I think I've found my types, classically gorgeous black men, nerdy, sorta awkward white guys (so no Bale, Owen, etc. the regulars), and Latino hunks. Haha.

Big Mike Mendez said...


Are you looking at a picture of me or something?


Laura Hart said...

I find myself at a loss. I've been trying to make a list of at least 5 women I'd switch teams for, and I can only come up with 2. Unless, of course, I devote hours on end to this, which I just don't have the attention span for...

My problem is that in Hollywood everyone is too skinny and I like real women. Thus, I have to think too long to try to come up with a list...

1. Kat Von D - I wish I had the courage to look as bad-ass as she does. The next best thing would be to be with her. Granted, she has no ass, but I'm hoping that all those tattoos will create a type of 'magic eye' kind of effects and maybe give her the illusion of one when she's naked. In pants, she's flat as a pancake. I love the little stars around her eyes...

2. Kate Winslet - not only do I think she takes on wise roles in films, she's beautiful. Classically so, like the kind of woman I see in famous old paintings. And her voice...soothing, womanly. I want her to read to be as I go to sleep.

That's my short list.

Oh, and your girlfriend. Can't forget her ;)

Laura Hart said...

Of course, if we want my man list I can fire that one off easy:

1. Clive Owen
2. Liam Neeson
3. Greg Grunberg
4. Glen Ford
5. Lee Pace (But only in Mrs. Pettigrew because he looks like Clive Owen's younger brother)

The top three change in order depending on my mood and the movie.

Fox said...

Ha! I was just gonna say that Mike looks like he's lobbying for a slot with his picture, but then Mr. Dorian Gray beat me to it. :)

And Laura... Clive Owen and his brother??? You freak, you!

whitney said...

So in that picture from must love dogs do you relate more to Cusack or Lane?

Here's my incomplete list of actors I'd go gay for:
1. Tobey Maguire
2. James Franco
3. Bob Dylan (1965, and he was in a few movies)
4. Christian Bale
5. Jeremy Davies
6. Larry David
7. Woody Allen
8. Jean Pierre-Leaud
9. Gene Wilder
10. Henry Fonda
11. Paul Schneider
13. Jason Schwartzman

I'd go gay for a lot of dudes.

elgringo said...

"I'd go gay for a lot of dudes."

That'll probably be the first nominated comment. Haha.

PIPER said...

I would sleep with George Clooney or Robert Downey Jr. I would hope that they could get a little "cool" juice on me because they're so frickin cool.

But if it were me and those two dudes in a room, I would have to go Clooney.

Man, if I didn't just whore myself out to be in contention for best post I don't know what I'd do.

I don't want to do Rob from High Fidelity, I just want to hang with the guy. I want to be the guy. Maybe I would do him and then crawl inside him. That's an idea.

elgringo said...

Haha, that's damn funny. But if you crawl inside him, you might already find me there, chillin'.

J.D. said...

The guys I'd go gay for:

1. James McAvoy
2. Anyone and everyone who was in The Dreamers
3. Casey Affleck (SOOO dreamy)
4. Scarlett Johansson
5. Jonah Hill
6. Nicole Kidman

Lunatone said...

Girls I'd go gay for. Do they have to be famous - or is that I list that I give you later? ;-)

My Famous Females:

(In no particular order)
Grace Kelly (need it even be mentioned?)
Amy Adams
Jenna Fischer
Anna Friel
Kristen Bell (with Tina Majorino almost edging her out - damn that girl's cute!)
Lucy Griffiths (From BBC's Robin Hood - look her up Scott, she's so damn gorgeous. And pretty curvy!)

I couldn't keep it to five... I'm totally feeling the ladies right now. Also, looking at the females above, they're all pretty and girly and I think I might be the butch.

Also, I have to throw Zooey Deschanel, Lauren Graham, Kate Winslet, and Audrey Hepburn honorary mentions

Also, I have a major girl-crush on Amanda Bynes. But in a hetero way.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe I forgot Cusack!

Dammit, amendments will have to be made!

I'm exempt from the list making...right? ;)

Fletch said...

1. Lance Bass
2. The Jonas Brothers (that's right, all three of 'em)
3. Dick Simmons
4. Bill Shatner


Aw hell. Ok:


Kimberly Grafton said...

1. America Ferrera
2. Alexis Bledel
3. Lauren Graham (that's right, I'd do Rory and then her mom... what can I say, I'm scandalous)
4. Kate Winslet
5. Catherine Zeta Jones
6. Whitney from Next Top Model
7. Brittany from last season of Biggest Loser (and she lives like 2 towns over from me, so if I did swing it could actually happen)

Fox said...

Did Piper just say he wanted some of Clooney's "cool juice" on him?

"Cool juice"... that's a new name for it. I wish the women I knew gave it that adjective.

And btw, in the past week, Piper has:

1. Wanted to be rubbed with gloves by a 63 year old woman,


2. Have Clooney and Downey Jr. squirt their juice on him.

Drunk commenting is awesome!!

Keith said...

Can I just have sex with Ewan McGregor five times instead of choosing five guys?

elgringo said...

Yes, yes you may.

mwhitlock said...

I can't believe Lane Meyer in Better Off Dead didn't make your Top-5-John Cusack-Performances List.

Really I'm just mad because I want to be Rob Gordon too. You stole my fantasy.

Interesting anecdote about John : Corin Tucker (of Sleater-Kinney) ran into John Cusack in an elevator once. He introduced himself as "Johnny".

elgringo said...

Mmmmmmm.... Johnny.

PIPER said...


Wait, you'd go gay for Scarlett? Huh? Wha? Wait.


Pitt is an MU grad and I heard he has chronic BO. So I'd bring a big bottle of old spice with you.

J.D. said...

Piper, I figured, like, I'm gay anyways, so to me that's like the way straight is for everyone else in here, so 'gay' then would be the equivalent of 'straight', and I'd certainly go straight for Scarlett, so I'd go gay for her.

Long story short: It's pointlessly cheeky.

Heather said...

I'd go gay for:

1) John Cusack
2) Denzel Washington
3) David Duchovny
4) Matt Damon, but only after he's just cut my hair so we can hide from the government that's after us, and then we have really great sex. Because otherwise, it's hard for me to get over that neck.
5) David Tennant
6) Jake Gyllenhaal
7) Topher Grace

and I don't really think he's all that good-looking, but is there any doubt that Hugh Grant could seduce ANYONE into bed??

1) Kate Hudson (but I probably wouldn't let her talk. She seems like an idiot. A sexy, sexy idiot)
2) Margaret Cho
3) Sarah Silverman
4) Katie Holmes
5) Thora Birch
6) Kat Von D
7) Mila Kunis

Literature Crazy said...

I concur with a majority of your list with the following minor exceptions:

1. Replacing Poitier with Redford (Sneakers was a tough film for me, so many great ones, including David Strathairn)
2. Replacing Denzel Washington with Djimon Hounsou
3. Adding someone completely inappropriate (and very likely underage) such as Penn Badgley
4. Adding someone with a British accent (which is almost necessary in any list of five things) like Robert Pattinson
5. Adding (because I'm a chick and to really follow the logic of this blog, I'm going to need a woman on my list) Jennie Garth--solely for the fact that we can talk about old times when she was awesome as Kelly Taylor, and how awesome it is that she's married to Peter Facinelli.

Erika said...

Now I'm going to have to ponder who I'd go gay for!!!