Thursday, July 31, 2008

Unseen DVD Blog-a-Thon: Fatal Attraction

Cinexcellence is hosting the Unseen DVD Blog-a-Thon.
Synopsis: pick up a DVD you normally wouldn't, watch it, write a little something.

For those of you who've never seen Fatal Attraction, this is the movie that teaches you that cheating on your spouse leads to the death of your child's pet. Every time. If you cheat, Mr. Tiddilywinks gets put in the wood chipper. Every time.

In short, Michael Douglas plays a businessman who has an affair with a co-worker, Glenn Close. Shortly afterward, she turns into a
crazy ass stalker. She does all the usual stuff: nighttime phone calls, creepy mixtapes, destruction of property, etc. But then she goes above and beyond her stalker duties. Wrist slitting, (fake?) pregnancies, and
Whitesnake hair. She's a real sicko.

Right away, the title made sense to me. Anyone who finds Glenn Close attractive deserves to die. Period. Her name is GLENN. That's not a sexy actress name, that's a computer programmer name. Also, being born after 1960 automatically disqualifies me from understanding why Michael Douglas ever had a career. The man looks like a unhappy California Raisin. I watched It Runs in the Family. The next day Future Scott called and said the pain wasn't going away.

There are just too many sex scenes in this movie. I'm no prude, but Ernest Does Dallas was sexier than Fatal Attraction. The last time I saw Glenn Close naked, she was crying on the floor of a shower. Now, that's either a scene description from The Big Chill or a personal story that I'll end now. Glenn Close nudity is a lot like gym class nudity. You know it's inevitable but you do everything you can to divert your eyes. Also, watching Douglas struggle to get his tighty-whiteys off wasn't pleasant either.

Disgusting sex scenes aside, the movie turned out to be pretty entertaining. There are some really tense scenes when you realize that Close isn't playing a monster, she's playing a woman with mental problems. It screams Play Misty for Me but still works as a sex thriller. The director, Adrian Lyne, knows about sex flicks. He's made Fatal Attraction, 9 1/2 Weeks, Indecent Proposal, Lolita, and my favorite Diane Lane film: Unfaithful.

All in all, if you're looking for a well-made film about something that could actually happen (the stalker part, not the sex with Glenn Close part) then you might want to pick this up. But from the looks of his filmography, Lyne has quite a few other movies you might want to watch instead. Just take a look at this successful director's progress.

He went from this:
To this:
His movies may all be pretty similar...but least his casting has improved.

Thanks to Cinexcellence for hosting the Unseen DVD Blog-a-thon. Without it, I might have never seen Fatal Attraction. And without seeing Fatal Attraction, I would have had to think of another reason to put up another Diane Lane picture.


Daniel said...

Dang, Unfaithful was a good movie. I liked it for Richard Gere's performance as much as I liked it for Lane, though.

Glenn Close does NOTHING for me.

elgringo said...

You're just lucky Glenn Close doesn't do anything TO you.

PIPER said...

Okay here's a story.

I worked with a director Neil Tardio, Jr. Right before I worked with him, I watched this movie for the umpteenth time. When Douglas busts into Close's apartment, he fumbles through a rolodex. In there is the name Neil Tardio and a real phone number. I asked Tardio Jr. about it and he said it was his father - he was an old school Hollywood guy. The producer of Fatal Attraction was playing a joke on him by putting his real phone number on there. Needless to say, his phone rang a lot after the movie was released.

Keith said...

I know the feeling. My phone number is tattooed just inside the crack of Michael Douglas's ass. Funny story: that's how I met my girlfriend!

Ms☆Go said...

UGH. :(

Review the movie, not the actors' looks.

...Though, I do have to admit that California raisin side-by-side was pretty accurate.

As for Glenn and Micheal, both are wonderful actors, looks aside.

And that came through in the movie.

As for Unfaithful (for the record, Streets of Fire is my Diane Lane movie of choice).

There were tiny details in that sex scene she did, that were so nakedly honest, like the tremors, the shy reluctance, and Dear God that ride home.

It was the difference between acting and the pornography Halle's Billy-Bob bronco ride.

She TOTALLY she'd have won the Oscar that year.

I actually think she was cast in that role, because of a very similar, smaller film she did earlier with Viggo Mortenson, A Walk on the Moon.

I think that one was better.

Anonymous said...

The Michael Douglas / California Raisin comparison made me giggle for about three minutes straight. :D

elgringo said...

Ms☆Go, you're totally right. My only defense is that for a sex thriller, you might want to think about hiring actors that people would want to watch have sex.

But you're right. Fatal Attraction might not have gotten a fair shake from me, it does work in a lot of ways.

Thanks for calling me on my shit.

1416, your comment made my day!

brian said...

i've never seen this movie (and probably never will). all i know about it is susan faludi's critique of it in backlash. her take on it is really interesting.


I heard Brian De Palma was supposed to make FATAL ATTRACTION.

If that would have happened, I may have actually liked it.

PS. One does not need a reason to put up a picture of Diane Lane for it will never be questioned.

Unknown said...


You are correct, sir! One does not need a reason to put up a picture of Diane Lane...