The Calamari Wrestler is surprisingly entertaining. The wrestling scenes are really fun and it's even more fun to watch him not wrestle. Being a human stuck in a giant squid's body isn't easy. However, according to this movie, it isn't that hard either. The sea monster walks around town without anyone batting an eyelash. People wave to him and sell him produce like he's just a regular Joe. He has tentacles. A lot of them.
Calamari spends most of his time trying to hook up with his human ex-girlfriend. Let me tell you, if you haven't seen a sex dream sequence involving a pretty Japanese woman and a giant, ten-tentacled sea-dweller, then you haven't seen The Calamari Wrestler. You also probably don't have the internet. Weird.
This movie is great because it's so absurd and everyone in the movie completely goes along with it. A squid is wrestling. No questions asked. He speaks in a muffled, distorted voice and runs around in big, black wrestling boots. Just another day in Japan. The costume itself is crazy. It's really great. Every time the expressions change on the giant costume, I was in tears. The eyes open and close, widen when he's supposed to be surprised, etc. A couple of the tentacles are controlled by the actor's arms but the majority of them swing around as free as Ewan McGregor in an indie film.
The action scenes are well-shot and exciting. The wresting is awkward, obviously. The two actors are hidden under gigantic foam squid costumes but still do their best to put on a good match. As a pro wrestling fan (ex-rabid fan), there were certain things I looking for in wrestling movies. Some movies with wrestling, Ready to Rumble and that one episode of "Family Matters" with The Bushwackers, for example, don't always capture the excitement of squared-circle action.
Calling the moves correctly, creating the right atmosphere, and making it look more real than it is, are all huge pluses. This movie does an okay job with all three. What The Calamari Wrestler lacks in an accurate representation of the "sport," it makes up for in comedy. [Author's note: This whole discussion is ridiculous. Haha. Seriously, what the hell are we talking about here? How real the fake portrayal of fake sport was? Wow. Has it come to that?] Where was I, oh yeah, COMEDY!
Here's a test for the readers out there who aren't quite sure if they should watchThe Calamari Wrestler or not. Would seeing this in a movie make you laugh?
1. The story is asinine.
2. Squid/human sexy dream sequences.
3. It's a movie about a pro wrestling squid!
4. The wrestling's entertaining (if you're into that sorta thing).
5. You finally find out who would win between a squid and an octopus!
6. There are no rapes to be revenged, no castrations, no hangings, and no victimized females.
6 1/2. Side note: there are, however, some victimized oceanic creatures
(if you're into the sort of thing).
When you think you've seen everything worth seeing, go see this movie.
That's about all I've got to say about this one.
I'm just going to leave you with this image.
Also, keep voting on poll question. As it turns out, I was the ONLY one who thought it was "awesome" (a fact that might have wanted to keep to myself) and the rest of the votes were split between "Indiana Jones 4 was a solid contribution to the series" and "Indiana Jones 4 was "sub-par, lacking, lousy, lame, etc." Sorry Spielberg, maybe you'll have better luck with Tintin. Yikes. 'TIL NEXT WEEK!
5 comments:
::add to queue::
::move to top of queue::
::wait impatiently::
My entire life has led up to this movie. Bless you, sir.
Bless you.
OMG. That is all. Its too bad you didn't find this movie when we were in that crazy moviestore in china town. I might have changed my opinion about it. I will probably have to netflix this movie. PS, I *heart* Ewan McGreggor and any and all references to him
My-my my my my. You know I was always the toughest to sell these types of movies to out of our old crew; but Scott, you always managed to park me on the sofa for such films, and I never once regretted it.
If you need to privately email me to let me know you loved this movie so much you pooped your pants while watching it, go for it. I'm sure I will be pooping away once I see it as well.
Magnifique.
Taylor, trust me, you will get a huge kick out of this movie...or a huge kick from me if you don't. :) Please keep your eyes open for my private e-mail.
Keith, seriously.
Kim, watch a movie called The Pillow Book. After that movie, I realized that I'm more familiar with his penis than my own...
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