Miraculous Merch: Belgian "Escape to Witch Mountain" Poster

I love foreign posters for American movies. The artwork is usually more interesting. The text is in another language. And it gives you a familiar-but-not-quite feeling.  

Escape to Witch Mountain was one of my favorite movies growing up. That's why I tracked down a copy of the Italian version of its poster. MovieGoods is selling the Belgian version (pictured above) for $19.99 and it's almost as cool as the one I own. Buy it.

Miraculous Merch: NES Cartridge JAWS Clock

Just wait until you geeks get a load of this!

BLAM!  Nintendo + Movies + Time!  What more could you ask for?  Etsy seller GeekGear is selling these NES cartridge clocks for $17.99.  This is the only movie-themed clock but there's something about a Super Mario Bros./Duck Hunt combo clock that makes my inner-child jump up and down.  

Miraculous Merch: Twice Upon a Time View-Master Slides

Only one person I know will truly appreciate the miraculousness of this merch. Twice Upon a Time is an animated film from 1983. It was created in the Bay Area and features some of the raddest animation I've ever seen. After a limited (and poor-performing) theatrical run, Twice had a short run on HBO, and a small VHS/Laserdisc release before falling into obscurity.

Laura (the amazing artist who designed the He Shot Cyrus banner) has championed this film since childhood. She's the one who introduced me to Twice via a coveted original release VHS tape she'd saved for over a decade. And even though we both loved the movie, I don't think either of us would have imagined that this rarely discussed and nearly forgotten film would have had merchandise! Especially View-Master merchandise!

For my younger readers, View-Masters were basically portable slide-viewers that looked like this. They most likely started out as some sort of war weapon before making the natural transition into children's toys. Today, with your iPods and your printing presses, View-Masters are all but obsolete. But that's what makes this merch even better.
Monsters1968 is selling these ultra-rare Twice Upon a Time slides on eBay for $25.00. You'd be a fool to let these slide out of your hands, especially if you're Laura.

Miraculous Merch: The 50 Greatest Movies Never Made

Film Threat creator and G4 host Chris Gore, best known for his Ultimate Film Festival Survival Guide, has written a couple other books but this one's my favorite.  "The 50 Greatest Movies Never Made" chronicles exactly that.  From a Salvador Dali/Disney collaboration to an awesome sounding Hitchcock thriller, this book has the lowdown on fifty movies you'd love to see (except for Howard Stern's failed Fartman flick).  Right now, Amazon is selling copies for ridiculously cheap.  I bought my copy.  Now you buy yours.  

Miraculous Merch: Your Favorite Directors

Retrowhale's Etsy Shop has quite a collection of rad stuff. My favorite are these movie director coasters. Pictured above are: Roman Polanski, Quentin Tarantino, Woody Allen, Jim Jarmusch (my second favorite), Stanley Kubrick, Spike Jones, Peter Jackson, Sofia Coppola, Tim Burton, Wes Anderson, Martin Scorsese, Spike Lee (my third favorite), Steven Soderbergh, The Coen Brothers, and Francis Ford Coppola (my absolute favorite). Apart from being used as coasters, they can also be used as wall hangings! My house is going to be covered in these guys. Retrowhale is really talented deserves to become a millionaire off of these things. So buy a bunch of them. Christmas, Kwanzaa, birthdays, etc. Even Thursday can be special with merch like this.

Miraculous Merch: Bill Murray

Nakatomi Inc. is selling these amazing Bill Murray stickers. They've got quite a bit of other cool stuff for sale as well. They're 6''x6'' which is pretty sizable for a sticker. All of your favorite movies are here: Caddyshack, Stripes, Ghostbusters, Rushmore (I believe?), Lost in Translation, and of course, The Life Aquatic of Steve Zissou. The pack sells for $12.00 and Nakatomi Inc. is offering FREE SHIPPING. I bought a pack last week and they arrived today. Needless to say, I'm in love. Buy some for yourself and some more for your friends.

Miraculous Merch: House of the Devil

ATTN: All Merchandising and Marketing Directors,

when promoting an out-of-the-box film, please market accordingly.

One-sheets, Director's Cut DVDs, and star-studded soundtracks are fine when you're promoting a James Bond movie.  But when you've got The House of the Devil on your hands, be smart and cater to your audience.  Because when you do, you might come up with an amazing idea like this:

The House of the Devil has been released in a special DVD/VHS combo pack.  From the beaten-up packaging (complete with "New Release" rental sticker) to the oversized clamshell, they've spared no expense on this Miraculous Merch.

Available at Amazon.com for 31.49.