Showing posts with label X-Men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label X-Men. Show all posts

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Finally!

Film School Rejects have brought me some good news for the holiday season.

I was a sophomore in high school when the previews for X-Men started popping up. As an avid fan of the comic books, the FOX cartoon, the action figures, the collectible cards, and pretty much anything else related to my favorite band of mutants, the first teaser trailers made myself and my equally nerdy friends pretty gosh darn excited.

The discussions began immediately. Which of the X-Men are going to be in the movie? Cyclops and Professor X, for sure. Hopefully Beast and Rogue. Will they don the blue and yellow costumes? Doubt it. Who's gonna be the villain? Probably Magneto, maybe Apocalypse. Where's the Salt and Vinegar Pringles? Probably by the computer.

That paint a familiar picture for you too?

One of my best friends is a huge Gambit fan. While I was rooting for a Jubilee appearance (don't ask, I can't explain it), he was praying Gambit would show up in all of his card-throwing, trench coat wearing glory. Then we watched the movie. My favorite character got a split-second shot in the last minute of the film while his favorite wasn't shown at all. We were both surprised and pleased by the amount of screentime Colossus received even if that accent was pretty rough.

A couple years later, X2 came out. As the Gambit fans already know, the closest thing we got was the name "Remy LeBeau" shown on a computer screen. By the time X-Men: The Last Stand came out, we were positive that it was Gambit's time. Nope. Ben "My Least Favorite Actor" Foster played a terrible Angel. Thirty thousand unnamed mutants fought it out in one of the least exciting battles of all time. The movie overall blew chunks and Gambit was nowhere to be seen. Maybe it was a good thing.

Now Wolverine's got his own movie. La-Di-Da. Almost as overrated as Superman, Wolverine is one of those superheroes that I never cared much about. However, this new film, X-Men Origins: Wolverine (awful title) will feature everyone's favorite Cajun cardplayer! Gambit will be played Taylor Kitsch from Friday Night Lights which should make some of my other friends pretty happy. Not only that, the other mutants showing up include Deadpool, Sabretooth, and The Blob (my favorite villian). Gavin Hood, the director of the impressive Tsotsi (2005), will take the helm on this project which is slated to be released on May 1st of next year.

So, we finally get to see Gambit. Hurrah. But what about Jubilee? She was Wolverine's sidekick throughout multiple comic series. Now they're making a Wolverine movie and she's not going to make an appearance? Lame sauce.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

5 Villians ROBIN Could Defeat


Christian Bale said recently that he would stop playing Batman if Robin was reintroduced. Apparently Bale has no use for a Boy Wonder sidekick. Robin never gets any respect. The last time we saw him on the big screen, it was in a nipple suit. No, thank you, Mr. Schumacher.

Batman Returns and The Dark Knight have blown up like crazy. People would inject the celluloid into their bloodstreams if they could. To me, there's just something missing without Robin. Maybe I'm just a sap for underrated superheroes, and sidekicks.

So, today I declare my desire for a Robin movie! No Batman, just Robin. It's time that fans of the gymnast-turned-crime fighter stand up and demand quality sidekick entertainment. There are plenty of young, talented actors who could play the part. Just keep Zac Efron the hell away from the set and I'll be happy.

Here's the only problem. Can Robin actually beat any supervillians by himself? He doesn't have any powers. He uses Batman's gadgets. He's really just a glorified circus performer.

That doesn't mean a movie should be made about Robin, the filmmakers just have to make sure that they have the right bad guy involved. So, here's a list of suggestions. Five villains that Robin could face in his very own movie. Oh, and if you click on the links, you'll see who I could cast in each role. Enjoy.



He could fly (thanks to a machine he built). He once got knocked out my Spider-Man's ancient Aunt Mae. He has super strength; but these days, who doesn't (besides Robin)?

The Vulture would make a great villain for the Robin movie because they're both named after birds. Imagine a Robin vs. Vulture movie poster. It could look just like the Alien vs. Predator poster! Sanaa Lathan could co-star.


Mojo
He's so fat that he can't walk. Without technology, he's can't even use his superpower. His superpower: television. He enslaved people by getting them to watch TV all day long.

The script could revolve around Robin having to compete on a Japanese game show before getting to fight Mojo. If Robin can run on a treadmill while jumping over big teddy bears and eat three mochi balls before falling into the pit of flour, he wins.

If he wins, I'm sure Robin could just punch Mojo in the face once and the ripple effect through the alien's fat pockets would put too much stress on his heart resulting in immediate death.


Quackerjack
Another bird-themed villain, this time from Darkwing Duck. A toymaker pushed out of business when video games became more popular than board games, Quackerjack rob banks so that he can keep making toys for sick children.

This is just the type of sick bastard that Robin needs to stop. I'm picturing a bloody brawl in a toy factory like Child's Play 2. Robin will say something like, "Playtime's over, bitch" before shoving the crazed duck-man into a pit of boiling plastic.


Vernimous Skumm
Robin could fight pollution. Yeah, I'm pretty sure he could fight pollution. It's Batman meets An Inconvenient Truth. I'll win an Oscar for Best Original Song and the Super Size Me guy will try to soak up some success by living in a Batcave for 30 days.

If Robin couldn't beat Abra Kadabra the Magician, then he deserves the same fate as Heath Ledger.


Who do you think Robin could beat? Do you think this movie will ever get made? Was it too soon to make a Heath Ledger's dead joke?



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